Hmmm tool-wise I've bought and discarded quite a few so maybe I can't be all that helpful there?
Not sure of the type connector shells or housings we're talking about but generally the "fingers" are best released with this type tool: http://www.amazon.com/OTC-4460-Elect...gy_auto_text_y
This particular variation is handy because it is two separate tools---I have one that is doubled ended, both tools on just one handle. Honestly it wouldn't hurt having two sets of these in order to release those fingers one on each side for some connectors. Its too easy to break or damage the "fingers" trying to release just one side at a time.
Also if anyone is digging into the actual connectors to remove, add or re-configure them terminal release tools are extremely handy to have. I would say these are best suited to those like MGMetalworks and myself who enjoy re-purposing factory connectors to suit needs never anticipated. Here's one example of these types tool sets: http://www.amazon.com/Wilmar-W89732-...VXX5R2Z9DPTER1
I personally have this set: http://www.amazon.com/Steelman-95978...3SF3T0MECRMK95
(FWIW that price as now listed is less
than I paid about 18 months ago.
Because I make and/or re-configure my own connectors, both factory and custom build, the above tools are invaluable. Honestly though most automotive-type terminals can be serviced with two or three tools at most so that's easier on the budget. The larger kits cover almost everything and because its a one time purchase along with being massively useful for me its a no-brainer buy.
This set would work for most of Ford's terminals: http://www.amazon.com/OTC-4461-6-Pie...8F1A9WWNFB5JXK
Do keep in mind there is a difference between terminal release tools
and connector shell release toools
A few words of caution about connectors; age and temperature greatly affects how successful we are when disconnecting them. If they're "old" its not unusual they'll almost fall apart regardless how carefully we try releasing them. If its cold they'll also be brittle. Using a hair dryer to warm them just before releasing the "fingers" tends to help especially if they've never been taken apart.
I'll add factory connectors tend to be very high quality and do their job nearly perfectly. When I cruise DIY scrap yards I snag several types of Ford connectors, especially those easily accessed and can be had with both male and female ends for future use. I don't mind spending the big money for a proper mating connector but only if its absolutely necessary and/or I don't already have something in the spare parts pile.
As an example I have spent $65 on one OEM switch and pigtail lead to add PDL control to the side doors of my '03 E250 EB.
Anyway hope some of this is helpful.